Life Lessons: Relationships pt.1

Published 10/09/2013 by Dani B.

Relationships can and will be the worst or best things that you will ever experience in your life. Trust me.

My first relationship started when I was 15 years old. I was a sophomore in high school so I was at a weird moment in my life. Even more oddly, it was with this guy that I really did not like. He always made jokes about me, put me down for being too smart, etc. So I retaliated with the same type of insults. But after a while, we started liking each other. To cut this part short, my friend then snatched us both and said that I liked him and he liked me and we should get together and we did. Homecoming 2005. October 21, 2005. My high school football team won the game and I scored my first real boyfriend.

Speeding up time, my first boyfriend was my first of everything. In more ways than one, I was not his first. So after our non-traditional first time, we started having issues. One day, he told me to go into his email and check to see if he got anything from his coaches or whatever, so I did. So when I went on his email, I was seeing emails from this girl that he liked and they were comparing my beauty to hers. He stated, “of course, you look better than Danielle.” That statement hurt me. I had found out that they were making out in the high school’s stairwell and that he was sucking on her breast in school or what not. Being the dumb in love girl I was, I believed my boyfriend at the time and I lost my best friend of 3 years.

After that incident, him cheating on me became second nature to him. He went on his college visit to a community college and the football players that were from the high school “hired” this girl to sleep with all the visiting players. And of course, he slept with her. The whole football team knew about it the next day. He confessed to me about it 3 months later.

We broke up after that. A day later, we get back together, courtesy of my mom. And this was a repeated cycle. We would argue and fight a lot also. One time I had busted his lip and he had broken my nose. We would always fight and argue but we “loved” each other. So after almost 2 years of arguing, fighting, him cheating, and me being stupid, we had a “lust” baby.

No, not a love child but a lust child. There was no love, just having unprotected sex.

After I am pregnant, he cheats on me again and finally breaks up with me (1 hour before I had an oratorical competition and yes, I placed very low because of it). That was July of 2007.

So, at this time, he has not attended any doctor’s appointments with me, wanted me to get an abortion,  got pissed off and had his family turn against me because of different reasons. I had a lot to deal with when I was pregnant.

January 18, 2008 comes around and I have my first contraction in World Geography class. (Oh, I was a teenage mom and I had my child my senior year. I still graduated with local, state, and national honors and was able to go to college, so I am not the stereotypical teenage mom.)

He is there in the labor and delivery room, crying more than I was, so was my mom who has always been my strong person. I really didn’t want him there but I wasn’t going to deny him to see his child being born. Then after being in labor for around 16 hours, I had Alexis.

After Alexis was born, then we decide to get back together and it didn’t last long. We were off and on again until March 12, 2009 (remember that date!!). That night, he said that he hopes that his child is nothing like me and hung up the phone.

It was over. I wanted nothing else to do with him. I regretted falling in “love” with him. I regretted sleeping with him. I regretting have my child with him. I love my child but I didn’t want a single drop of his DNA in her. He was unappreciative and he broke me. I was loyal. I was faithful. I did everything I could to keep us together. I kept his dark secret and til this day, have not told a soul. I gave up some of my morals and it seems that the only things I got from him was infidelity, lies, and harsh words.

His reason for cheating on me: I wasn’t a strong woman that he needed in his life.

Well, whatever….

 

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